Sometimes the Hardest Thing and the Right Thing are the Same ; for <user site="livejournal.com" user

[bestintention]

One encounter.

One decision to go out, a few drinks, and a very attractive, very flirty guy wearing down her defenses led to his apartment. His bed. And a night full of things Maddie thought she'd never be doing. And now, months later, it's obvious that one of those decisions hadn't been the right one.

She sits in his office, having told the receptionist that it was urgent to see him, and she waits. She fidgets with her fingers, looks around nervously, and considers bolting. But after months of searching with no luck whatsoever, she caught a news story one morning, getting ready for class. And there he was: Tyler Green. The father of her soon to be born baby.

Yeah, it's probably a good idea to at least let him know. Even if she's scared to death of his reaction. This was the right thing to do, right?

...

Right?

Comments

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

It's a long trip, that's for sure. But with so many appointments over the past months, she's gotten used to it. Although, the thought of navigating the city with a baby has her a bit nervous. Of course, her parents want her to move home, but ... she's not sure she wants to do that just yet. "Hm? Oh ... yes. I've got one more year, and then I graduate."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

"Jesus," he mumbled under his breath. He knew this wasn't technically his fault, they had both been there and they had taken the proper precautions. But fuck. She was so damn young. He made a turn to head the right way and tried to relax back against his seat with his hand low on the wheel. "On break yet or what?" Because at least it seemed like the baby would come over summer break for her. There wasn't one thing about that to make him feel better.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

She doesn't miss the exclamation, and it makes her look down at her fingers, fiddling with the silver ring she wears on her thumb, sighing softly at she does so. The situation was not exactly the best for her, nor for him, she imagines, but it's hearing things like that that remind her just how unprepared she is for this whole thing. "Yeah. I finished my classes last week. My parents ... want me to move back to Wisconsin." She's not sure why she offered the information, he certainly didn't ask.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler had never been a roll with the punches kind of guy. He was a fast thinker, and he talked faster...he was just working on it now. They were heading in the right direction still, but it was the mention of her parents that broke him. He couldn't imagine her having to tell them all of this, that the guy just wasn't around, and there was just this overwhelming feeling of guilt, even without the test results in his hand. They got about a block away from where they were going before he spotted a space to park on the street and found himself pulling over into it and turning the engine off.

"Fuck," he mumbled under his breath. She really was almost just a kid.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

To say that Maddie is confused when Tyler pulls off the road, and turns the car off is an understatement. She turns to face him, words on her lips falling to the wayside once she gets a glimpse at how utterly stricken and - and ... lost that he looks. She's not entirely sure of what she should do or what she should say ... or that she actually knows what he's thinking, just that he doesn't look ... good.

"Hey ... "

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler dropped his hand from the wheel and tipped his head back against the headrest. As angry as he was at himself for this situation, though it was out of his control, he was more furious with himself for not having it together already. He wasn't a man easily thrown, though this had completely knocked him.

"Don't," he started as she spoke, sure that his pride wasn't going to handle the girl trying to console him just then. A few seconds passed before his eyes were open and he was considering again.

"What do you need?" he questioned. "No bullshit, just what do you need me to do?"

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

She quiets, and just watches, barely breathing. Of course this was overwhelming - it had been for her, too, and still was, when she let herself sit and think about what all of this meant. The last thing that she wants is to offend Tyler, or to put even more pressure on him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean ... " she sighs, and turns, looking back out of her window, at the cars passing by, without any knowledge of what's going on in theirs. Must be nice, that total obliviousness to their situation, their feelings, no matter whatever decision they make here.

"What? I don't - wh - what are you willing to do?"

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler shrugged, honestly unsure of that. He knew that the responsible thing to do was, to be involved emotionally and financially however he needed to be. But he was pretty sure he wasn't capable of doing at least half of that...He rubbed his hands on the top of his slacks and looked over to her.

"When's it coming again?" he asked, mind shot for details he normally would have memorized in any other situation. Tyler wasn't one to forget.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

The last thing that Maddie wanted to do was to trap Tyler into something that he wasn't interested in being a part of. And this was already more than she could have ever hoped for. What did she need? She was moving home to be with her parents at least for a little while. She was still going to go to school. She herself was not financially prepared for a child - but that was one of the reasons she was moving. Would it seem like that's all that she was after if it's what she asked for?

"Weeks. Early November. Um ... I guess ... help with expenses would be good, but ... please don't feel like you have to."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

"Don't," he said again, seemingly the way a majority of her words would be met with this time. It wasn't that he wasn't allowing her to talk, just preventing her from saying whatever it was that didn't need to be said. He started to curse again but stopped himself. He figured that wasn't going to help anything, though hearing weeks was going to throw him another point later.

"Don't ride the subway anymore. Get a parking pass for school." He took a deep breath and shook his head. "I don't want a kid." And at least that kept his intentions simple enough.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

It annoys her, really, that everything she says apparently isn't worth hearing. But instead of arguing, or even continuing to speak, she just sighs heavily, drops her shoulders and once more looks from her window. It seems the only thing she can do. She understands why he's upset, she really does, but all it does is serve to make her more uncomfortable than she already is.

"I won't be here much longer anyway. Moving back to Wisconsin just as soon as my last final is taken." She glances over and nods. She hadn't really been expecting anything different. "You don't have to be involved if you don't want to be."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

He couldn't place the feeling, but there was something definitely coming up in him when she mentioned moving back to Wisconsin. When the fuck had they decided that? When the hell did he decide that they had anything to decide together anyway? That wasn't going to work. Maybe it was a money thing? How insulting would it be to just write her a check now? He figured that wouldn't go over well.

"Alright."

He let out a sigh and reached to turn the key back in the ignition, looking over his shoulder for a minute before pulling back into traffic and heading away from their destination and instead a few blocks over. Boxes, that's what they would need for her to move. Uptown, not to Wisconsin.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

They hadn't decided anything of the sort. She had decided, with the information and the suggestions from her parents, that it might be the right decision to make, at least for the time being. She barely knew Tyler, why would she have to discuss anything about her life, since it had nothing to do with him? She didn't come to talk to him as an excuse to get money. She thought it was the right thing to do - to let him know. She's rethinking that decision now, to be sure.

"Okay, then."

She figures he must know where he's going, even if she notices that it's not the right way. Little did she know just what he had planned.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler drove the few blocks without another word. How the hell had he gotten himself into this situation? His only saving grace in it all was that a young girl in New Troops probably couldn't afford anything more than a tiny apartment it shouldn't have been that hard to pack up. Every time he found himself ready to curse aloud, he simply tapped the steering wheel instead.

Soon he was pulling over to a spot almost near the packing supply store and shutting the car off. He almost asked if she wanted to come, but that would have been stupid. Girls couldn't carry shit normally, especially not that pregnant.

"I'll be back."

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

As far as Maddie is aware, there is not much else that needs to be said. She just wants to go home, which is one reason why she's so confused as to why they're heading in the wrong direction. She worries, though, that she'll just push him that much further if she asks, so she's very quiet, just waiting to see what happens next.

She frowns when they park, and almost asks what's going on then, but he's already got the door open and is halfway out of the car before she's able to.

"I ... guess I'll be here."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler returned to the car no more than ten minutes later, one guy from the store carrying a dozen boxes Tyler was pretty sure would fit in his trunk trailing behind him. It took a minute or two to get them loaded, but eventually the trunk was closed and Tyler was pulling his sunglasses back down over his eyes.

"You've got roommates?" It was just something he assumed, or maybe she had told him at some point. Really, he just wanted to say fuck it all and go drink.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

And ... those are a lot of boxes. Maddie is even more confused at this point, her expression clearly showing that. Still, she isn't able to ask what's going on as he gets into the car, because he cuts her off before she even gets started. Her eyes narrow and she shakes her head yes. "Yeah, I do, I've got three of them ... why?"

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler shook his head as he pulled back onto the street. "It's fucking stupid for you to move home. And you're too far from campus. You can stay at the apartment until..." He trailed off, obviously meaning that she could come live with him until she was ready to move home. Until the kid was born. He pretty much owed her that, right?

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

A tiny, offended huff of breath leaves Maddie's lips as she whips her head around to look at Tyler. She'd already had plans! Again, when had they even discussed this turn of events? And after all of this ... why would he offer his own place? Why is he trying to confuse her? Either he's interested in this whole ... thing, or he isn't. "You want me to ... live with you?"

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler let out a quick laugh. "Oh, so not even close," he replied, shaking his head. "I don't want shit getting worse than it already is. At least if you're there, you're not in whatever the fuck Wisconsin...and, you know." He could help. Whenever he actually managed to wrap his mind around this.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

And that just upsets her even further. "Look - I'm not asking for anything from you, especially not pity. If you don't want me to live with you, then don't offer it. I'm perfectly happy going home to live with my family. At least then, I won't be treated like I'm some sort of ... I don't know ... burden! No, this isn't ideal, but it's happening. And you don't have to be a part of anything if you don't want to. Don't start being chivalrous just because you feel like you have to!"

So maybe she's getting a little bit emotional. She can't help it.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler was a little surprised at the outburst, not used to that from her, but then again...he didn't technically know the girl. She was just carrying his kid. Fuck, life was complicated. For a guy who liked things simple, that was about as bad as it got.

He stayed quiet until they made it to his parking garage where he could pull in and at least be a safe driver.

When he turned the car off and pulled the keys into his hand, he looked down at them, almost like he was going to offer some sort of sincere thought.

"I don't know what the protocol is here but I'm assuming that writing you a check would be offensive. Not that I'd know what to write on it in the first place," he mused, knowing that he would probably feel obligated to continue adding zeros until he ran out of room.

"I wanna figure this out, for whatever it's worth. Stay here until it's over, then we'll work on it."

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

It's mostly due to stress and out of whack hormones than it is anything else. Immediately following her words, Maddie regrets them. What had Tyler really done to deserve such a thing? She doesn't apologize, though, she just sits quietly in her seat, wishing to be able to just disappear.

She continues looking from the window, even though there's not that much to see. And when they're parked, once she's unbuckled herself, only then does she look over to watch Tyler carefully.

"If that's what you feel comfortable doing, I wouldn't find it offensive. Not that that's what I want - I mean, it's not what I came here for. I don't require anything from you, you know. She sighs, ducking her head, nodding. "Alright. If that's what you want from me, it's what I can do for you."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler reached up and rubbed his eyes tightly for just a moment, taking at least that to pull himself completely together. Being thrown off wasn't something he did well. When he removed his seatbelt and looked back out the windshield, he let out a quick breath.

"Yep, alright. Let's continue this disaster, shall we?"

Before she could even answer, he was moving from his seat and going around to open her door for her. Shaking his keys back and forth in his free hand almost impatiently.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

Well. This was certainly going to be pleasant, wasn't it? Staying with someone she doesn't even know, who considers this whole thing a ... disaster. Sure, it's not ideal, but Maddie certainly doesn't think of this baby as a disaster, or as something that's ruined her life. Trying to stay positive would be difficult if this behavior continued. At least if she had a room of her own, she wouldn't have to hear it all the time. That was something.

Even if she wanted to answer, there wasn't much to say that would make the situation any better. Instead, she tries to get out of the car quickly, even though she can barely see her feet. There really was nothing else to do but to forge on, hopefully making the best out of this new step.