Sometimes the Hardest Thing and the Right Thing are the Same ; for <user site="livejournal.com" user

[bestintention]

One encounter.

One decision to go out, a few drinks, and a very attractive, very flirty guy wearing down her defenses led to his apartment. His bed. And a night full of things Maddie thought she'd never be doing. And now, months later, it's obvious that one of those decisions hadn't been the right one.

She sits in his office, having told the receptionist that it was urgent to see him, and she waits. She fidgets with her fingers, looks around nervously, and considers bolting. But after months of searching with no luck whatsoever, she caught a news story one morning, getting ready for class. And there he was: Tyler Green. The father of her soon to be born baby.

Yeah, it's probably a good idea to at least let him know. Even if she's scared to death of his reaction. This was the right thing to do, right?

...

Right?

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[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler didn't remember everyone he had ever had sex with. He hardly remembered half, and of those he probably wouldn't get both a first and last name. He definitely didn't have phone numbers. When he was told on his way back into the office on a very easy going Wednesday, he was told that there was a young lady in there for him. Wouldn't have been the first time that was code for him getting laid at work. He gave his receptionist a grin, since the woman was old enough to be his mother and acted more like a mother than a secretary. Might have been one of the only women on the planet he respected.

When he walked in and saw her though, he remembered. Not all of it, and definitely not a lot, but enough. He knew who she was, he remembered her name, and he knew it had been a while. He had a small smirk on his lips, wondering if she remembered him as he walked around to his side of the desk. "Why do I have a strange feeling you're not here to report some Wall Street fraud?"

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

It's easy for Maddie to remember, considering she's only ever been with three people. Two, well before she'd ever met Tyler. So there was no doubt in her mind, and really, no possible way that anyone else was the father of this baby. She feels awful that she's waited so long to come by, but it was incredibly difficult to find him when she'd never even gotten more than a first name.

How lucky that she'd caught that interview when she had, otherwise she probably would have given up. She waits what feels like forever, and then she catches sight of him, for the first time in months, and she fumbles as she stands, pulling her shirt down and over the top of her rather obvious belly.

"Um. No - no, I'm not here for that."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Oh shit. THIS. This right here was the one thing he had to figure every guy feared. That one face that looked familiar as a one night stand...attached to one hell of a beach ball under her clothing. That shit didn't bother Tyler so much, though, mostly because he hadn't ever managed to have sex without a condom. He wore them like it was his religion.

His smirk stayed in place as he went to take a seat behind his desk, not completely forgetting his manners as he fired off a quick text to Gloria, the older secretary, to bring a bottle of water for the random woman she had let into his office.

"Definitely don't think I handle adoption or paternity. If you need someone, I can give you a card."

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

Ah. She'd feared that exact expression. At least he hasn't told her to leave - maybe she can actually get the words out that she'd practiced so many times in her head, and in front of her mirror at home. Maddie'd been careful, too, she'd been on birth control at the time, and they had used a condom - for most of the encounters that night. Somewhere along the lines, something had failed. And once she'd found out she was pregnant, well, there was no other option for her other than keeping it. She just ... wanted to let him know. That's all.

"That's - um ... that's not why I'm here. Do you remember me at all?"

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Oh fuck it all. Here it comes, he was sure of it. He watched her carefully and tried to decide what this was. He made a living, a very good living, in reading people better than they were currently reading themselves. Then again, most of the time, he wasn't personally involved and it clouded his judgement. Shit.

A moment had passed before he snapped himself out of it and he was sitting back up in his chair. Yeah, he remembered her. She had been awkward and he hadn't been sure she was old enough to drink. "Maddie," he replied, giving a small shrug once he had. "But I can't see how that one would matter, since I definitely remember quite a bit of latex rubber."

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

A small breath escapes her lips and she nods. Yes, she'd been awkward - she's always awkward, but it hadn't been enough to keep him from talking her into going home with him. She went, happily. And did quite a few things she never thought she would do, happily. And later, started getting sick, very unhappily. And when she'd taken the trip to the doctor, after three positive tests ... yes, she was not at all happy for a long time afterwards. But there's not much she could do about it now.

"Yes, there was. And somewhere along the line, one failed. And so did my birth control. I know you probably think that I'm here for money ... o - or something like that, but I'm not. I'm not that kind of person. I just wanted ... well, I thought that you should know. That's all."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler watched her.more carefully at that, just staring for a moment. When he decided she was serious, he reached into his drawer and pulled out one of the many cards he kept stacked there. "Paternity test," he said, passing the card across the desk to her. "Tell Gloria to make an appointment on your way out and i'll be there. I'll even pay for it." Yes, he was being an ass, but no...he didn't quite believe her. He watched her another moment and his eyes drifted for a moment from hers to her stomach. Another glance up at her and he just fucking knew it. She was telling the truth. Fuck.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

She doesn't argue the point - it's better than straight out being told that she's a liar. Because if there is anything that she isn't, it's that. Proving it by taking a paternity test is not a problem in the slightest. She takes the card, and offers a nod, and stands there, not entirely sure of what to do next. Should she just leave? Or stay? Or ... she sighs, and runs a hand through her hair. "Of course. Do you want - I don't know, my phone number or something? Address? I mean, I don't expect anything .. "

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

All in all, at least he wasn't just tossing her out the door and calling her a liar. His mind was just fucking blown, and he wasn't sure how to handle that. He watched her for a moment before he shrugged. "If there's a reason for me to have it, I'll get it at the appointment you set up with Gloria." He wasn't trying to be a dick, he was just trying to get her out of his office fast enough that he could break into the scotch kept in his lower drawer and faceplant into the desk. Fuck life.

He watched her for another moment before he reached to straighten his tie and shifted some papers on his desk. "See you then."

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

He's not, and she's grateful that she got to say what she needed to say. She nods, and takes a step backward, and then another. No reason to stay. She'll make the appointment, and go home, and study some more for finals, and try to decide what she's going to do over the summer. After all, by the time next semester starts, if she's at home in Wisconsin, she'll be so pregnant, she won't be able to fly back. Decisions.

"Alright. I - I am sorry for all of this. I never intended it to happen. I just - yeah."

And with that, she'll make her way out of the office, and to the secretary to make that appointment, face flaming red at the pity she can clearly see in her eyes.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Tyler really just wanted this dumb fucking doctor to get in and do whatever it was he had to do to prove to him what both he and the, thankfully not, underage girl there with him already seemed to know. The kid was his. Fucking ten years of condoms and regular testing and every fucking precaution a guy in his situation could take, and it was all for nothing. He tried to keep the miserable look off his face as he forced his foot to stop tapping on the linoleum. "Sweet. Just nine years older than you," he said dryly, pulling out his phone again to delete the messages from Gloria telling him to put the phone away and be supportive.

"Christ, is it always this slow here?"

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

Maddie may be naive about some things, but this wasn't one of them. She doesn't miss the sighs, and the way he's constantly on his phone, or the foot tapping. He doesn't want to be here. And after this, he doesn't have to be. Her intention was not to trap him, or even force him to be a part of her life, nor the baby's. She just wants to prove she's not lying, and go. She's got a final today, after all.

"Could be worse. I could actually be underage. That would be fun to explain." With a sigh, she turns to face him. "I wouldn't know, I've never been here before."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler was just unimpressed with the day in general. When she spoke again, he gave a short laugh. "You were at a bar, drinking. Misrepresentation to falsify age. I'd get out of it." He leaned back in the chair and pushed his phone into his pocket just as the doctor walked in and started explaining the simple procedure to both of them, but then just to Maddie when it was made clear by Tyler's lack of attention...well, that he wasn't paying attention. Unfortunately, that was just a rouse that he had perfected in years of court. He heard every word.

When he had finished up with Maddie, the doctor washed his hands and finished labeling the viles before coming over to get a cotton swab from Tyler's cheek and suggesting they draw blood to be sure. Reluctantly, but quickly all the same, Tyler was shedding his jacket and rolling up the sleeve of his shirt so he could be stuck.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

"I'm not a liar. I've never been a liar. And I usually never go out and drink. So, hey, it wasn't exactly my best night, either, in terms of choices, actions nor consequences."

She huffs softly, and turns her eyes to the opposite wall. She doesn't remember Tyler being so ... unpleasant. But then, they were together that night for a wholly different reason than they're together now. Maybe after he got the proof he was looking for, they could just ... be on their merry ways. Not like she's going to insist that he stays.

Maddie stays quiet throughout the entire ordeal. It's not so bad, but she hates giving blood, and she's glad that it's over. When the doctor tells her that she can sit up and get ready to go, she does. The sooner she's at home, the better.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler had been trying to joke, something he didn't do so often, and realized it fell flat when she was so obviously unimpressed by it. Lawyer humor didn't often translate to non lawyers, he supposed. Oh well. He rolled his sleeve down when they were finished and pulled on his jacket while she got dressed.

As soon as they were excused, he walked out of the office after grabbing the bill and was on his way to the elevator. They would know in a week, which seemed like forever from then. But then what? As soon as he was in the elevator, his head dropped back against the wall and there was a split second where his hand went up to cover his face like he almost might lose it. It was instantly covered up as soon as Maddie caught up to take the elevator down and he was his usual self.

A moment passed between them in silence, and he already knew everything he needed. The baby was his, she wasn't lying. The tests would confirm it, he was sure. He wouldn't have been able to live with himself if he had just walked off.

"So you take the subway or what?" he questioned, knowing that it was pretty rare for a college student in that city to be able to afford a car or the parking it required everywhere.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

So, maybe Maddie had taken the comment completely the wrong way, but a lot of that had very much to do with the abundance of hormones in her body. It's really the one thing she can't get used to - the being happy one moment, the next either sad or angry. She considers, for a moment, offering an apology, but by the time she decides on it, the moment has passed.

She catches the fleeting look, but doesn't ask. Of course, she realizes that this was a lot to take in, and maybe it would have been better for at least Tyler if she hadn't found him, but she thought he deserved to know. She would never expect or ask anything of him that he wasn't comfortable giving. She doesn't ask what's going through his head, because honestly, it's not her place.

Maddie turns, a bit surprised. She'd figured the ride down would be in complete silence. "Well, I have a car, but I don't use it very often. So, yeah, it's usually public transportation for me."

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler nodded when she answered and pressed the button down for the underground garage. "Where are you going after this?" he asked, obviously implying that he was going to drive her because he suddenly didn't like the idea of her taking the subway. Oh fuck, he seriously was starting to care and it had only been twenty minutes.

He stepped from the elevator when the doors popped open and dug for his keys in his pocket as he led her toward the dark blue Mustang not far from them.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

Maddie is surprised at the realization that Tyler means to drive her home, but she won't say no. It's much quicker than walking, the bus or the subway. This time, she does offer a vocal 'thank you', even if she can't quite bring herself to meet his eyes. Not that she thinks that he's looking at her, anyway.

She's quiet as she follows, although she does admire the car, for just a moment.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

Tyler missed her looking at the car and instead just went to pull the door open for her on his way to the drivers side. He had the key in and the engine started by the time she was sitting down, and a rock song blasted for just a second before he reached to turn the radio off. His mind was too blown to deal with extra noise. "Can you give me directions or am I on my own?" He asked as they pulled out of the garage and onto the busy streets.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

By the time the next morning came around, Tyler was up earlier than the amount of alcohol he consumed the night before should have allowed. He hadn't bothered to dress, just kept his towel wrapped around his hips as he stood over the stove to make his breakfast with the paper next to his plate.

His usually styled hair was slicked back, still damp from his shower. He was aware that she was probably still there. Chances were she wouldn't leave, if he remembered her properly. But she easily could have gone home in the middle of the night. But he needed at least one more cup of coffee before he was ready to deal with that.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

Maddie was still there, yes, and exhausted from a long night of ... attempting to get comfortable in this new place, made all the more difficult by the knowledge that she probably wasn't even wanted. But she couldn't lie in bed forever, these days, her body worked on a timer, it was was time for breakfast.

Eventually, she forces herself to get up and make her way out to the kitchen. pausing awkwardly the moment that she notices that she's not alone. What exactly is she supposed to ... say? Or do? Perhaps a soft 'good morning' as she attempts to find herself something to eat is enough.

She hopes, anyway.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

A stereotypical soft grunt was all he gave in return to her greeting before shoving the spatula back into his pan of eggs. Yeah, there was probably enough to share. Breakfast for two. But he probably would have kicked his own ass if he'd said that much out loud.

His free hand went for his cup of coffee to down what remained of the rather hot liquid, for only a second wondering if he should offer her a cup. But she couldn't, and he realized it before he spoke.

He set his cup back to the counter before he found himself looking over his shoulder to see what she was doing. She was really there, and this was really happening.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

Well, it was better than being ignored, that's for sure. She doesn't think anything of it as she pokes through the refrigerator shelves, finally finding cream cheese, and a container of strawberries. Now, to find a bagel. That wasn't difficult, though, as it wasn't hard to find the bread box and peek inside. She's easy enough to please, no going out of his way to cook anything elaborate. Fruit and that bagel, maybe some milk.

Coffee would be amazing, but probably not the best idea while she was in this condition. She can smell it from where she stands, though, and that was about as good as it was going to get for her. Coffee. She can't wait for the day that she can have that first cup after a long time away.

Cutting the bagel in half, taking a moment to find the toaster - snacking on a berry while she waits. Trying to ignore the fact that she feels like she's ... taking over his place, which isn't what she wants to feel like at all.

[jolygreen-giant.livejournal.com]

He finally turned the stove off and dished bacon and eggs onto a plate before he was grabbing a glass of orange juice and going to take a seat at the counter. Before long, though, his eyes found her and he was fixed on her.

"So how long do we technically have until," he paused a moment as he thought of the proper way to say it. "You know, until the whole kid thing?"

It wasn't so much that he had forgotten, just that he needed to be reassured they did still have time. Even if it was just a couple of weeks. How much time until his spacious apartment turned into a nursery ground.

[bestintention.livejournal.com]

It still takes a few minutes before her bagel is all toasted and loaded up with cream cheese and she's able to sit, groaning softly as she does. Yes, she's only been standing for a few minutes, but it's been a few minutes too much. The silence isn't exactly what she would call comfortable, but she manages to eat without feeling too self-conscious.

She's surprised when Tyler speaks, and she looks up, hand immediately touching her (admittedly) huge belly. "Oh, right, yes - about a month left, unless she happens to come early."

Not long, but hopefully not so soon that he can't acclimate - although, honestly, there probably wasn't enough time for him to get ready or come to terms with the fact that soon, a tiny baby would be taking residence here. God, does Maddie ever feel guilty, all over again.